Tag Archives: advice

Stop Chasing This And Start Chasing That!

Stop. Stop it right there. I know what you’re doing right now, oh faithful reader of PrettyPlease – you’re judging me. First, I haven’t texted or called or blogged since before Baby North West was born/conceived (date of conception may be questionable, but that’s neither here nor there). Second, I showed up with an uber vague title which means WHAT Raji, WHAT! (I’m getting there I promise, I promise). Anywho, the POINT is that I’m BACK. 



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Now that we’re done being mad for the separation anxiety we caused, it’s time to get on with the purpose of my EXTREMELY vague title. So often, we are told to chase things in life. Here’s a minor layout as to what we’re supposed to chase in our lives: 

 

Age 0 – 4: No one cares. Just learn your ABC’s. Learn how to share and get potty trained. This is the most legit time in your life – everyone has zero expectations from you other than don’t eat mud and don’t be that kid who starts screaming in the middle of an outing with your parents.

 

Age 5 – 18: You’re parents want the best for you. Hence, they start teaching you to chase. During this time period, you are told to chase grades. Anything lower than an A, and you need to keep chasing buddy. Once you get that “A” average, the next thing you’re going to be chasing will be the idea of your dream career. My amazing Indian parents thought I would be a doctor (fail, to this day I can’t look at a needle without crying), a lawyer (yea until I realized I hated the law), and an engineer (why couldn’t they understand I just wanted to be a princess??). So now you’re chasing your grades, the idea of career, and the pursuit of a top-tier college which brings me to..

 

Ages 18 – 22: College. This is where you roll up your sleeves, get into the nitty gritty, cue some Rocky fight music on Spotify and start chasing. CHASE THAT DIPLOMA, BABY! Cuz no diploma, no job.



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Ages 22 – the rest of your life: M & M. Marriage and Money. Both marriage and money are great right? Yup, but what if I told you I can tell you two things to chase instead that will give you an even better future? It’s true. I’m effing badass, and I got your back, so LISTEN UP:

STOP CHASING MARRIAGE



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I get it. I get it. (Drake voice) Some people genuinely dream about their wedding day since the tender ages of 3 (I am rolling my judgmental eyes at these people, but hey let’s agree to disagree). For some people, their life goal is to find a suitable partner who will take care of all their needs and wants and then build a family with them – fair enough. I don’t disagree that marriage is and should be the end goal – but the entire pursuit of marriage becomes a frenzy for some people. Marriage is not a race to the alter – it’s simply the next natural step which should be taken when it is right to do so, not because you hit a certain age or your parents want a son-in-law (buy them a puppy, it might buy you some time).

START CHASING COMPANIONSHIP: 

Instead of considering every single new person you date the potential to be your life partner and creating unnecessary expectations, start meeting people and understanding what they’re genuinely about. Focus on the individual – their traits, their habits, their values, and not whether or not they’d look great in a designer tux. Then enjoy each other – fully focus on what you want and what your partner wants – and when both sets of expectations align – gloriously move onto the next step.

STOP CHASING MONEY

I was absolutely guilty of this when I first got out of college. I took one of the first jobs that I was offered and ran with it – thinking, I will use this experience to work towards my dream job. Then of course, a common pitfall which happens to a LOT of us occurred – I became a slave to my paycheck. I got so caught up in chasing the dinero that I forgot to remember what I should be chasing: my dreams and my own goals. We get caught up chasing jobs which we think are going to make us so much money, which for the most part is great – but not when you don’t love what you do.

START CHASING YOUR CAREER:

This should be your focus. Chase your ambitions. What are you good at? What do you love doing? Then determine how to create the best career and roadmap for that ultimate goal. Because it’s true – when you love what you do, the money will gradually follow!

 



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So your homework is to learn and love this equation: CC > MM. Chase companionship and your career, and stop chasing marriage and money. And yup, thank me later (via roses, only if they’re red). Till next time kittens! Xoxo!

 

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Why Dating Sucks Pt. 3

Hi!!! First name, Princess! Last name Raji! PrincessRajiPrincessRaji (who needs a hype man with me around?) 

Pop Quiz time!

So far in my dating blog series we have learned:

a) Where do we even find people to date in the first place?

b) When we do find a potential person – are they even legit enough to date?

c) All of the above

d) Jack shit.

If you answered D.. 

Continue reading

45 Life Lessons By A 90 Year Old

I ran across this post on StumbleUpon yesterday evening and I found it enlightening.. Not only was it filled with 45 magical mantra’s, but something about it being written by an elderly person who has lived most of their life put it in perspective. Too often we are caught up in the day to day headaches, mundane activities, and short-sighted obstacles.



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Here are the 45 life lessons:

1. Life isn’t fair, but it’s still good.

2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.

3. Life is too short not to enjoy it.

4. Your job won’t take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and family will.

5. Don’t buy stuff you don’t need.

6. You don’t have to win every argument. Stay true to yourself.

7. Cry with someone. It’s more healing than crying alone.

8. It’s OK to get angry with God. He can take it.

9. Save for things that matter.

10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.

11. Make peace with your past so it won’t screw up the present.

12. It’s OK to let your children see you cry.

13. Don’t compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn’t be in it.

15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye… But don’t worry; God never blinks.

16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.

17. Get rid of anything that isn’t useful. Clutter weighs you down in many ways.

18. Whatever doesn’t kill you really does make you stronger.

19. It’s never too late to be happy. But it’s all up to you and no one else. Continue reading

3 Simple Steps To Make You A Better Person

Help me help you. I’m huge on introspection, which can be good or bad at times. With introspection comes careful examination of one’s habits – what is and is not working? Our generation is currently in a rush to make it to the top, to launch the next new hot start-up, we’re constantly glued to our phone, and our idea of a date is Facetime. Though technologically advanced, we lack some fundamentals, which I’ve managed to sift through. One thing I want to bring back is the air of personalization .. with friends, employers, and family. Here are three things to help make you a better person:

1) COMMUNICATE IN PERSON

This is what human interaction looks like nowadays:

Boy: Hi ;)

Girl: Hiya whats up?

Boy: Nothing. Bored. Chillin. K, time for the gym, ttyl.

Girl: Okay bye!!! ;) :) (emoji) (emoji) (stupid emoji) (emoji)

Lame. And, yes, I’m judging you if you have a similar text in your phone.



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Texting is written communication. I, being in love with writing, can respect that form of communication. However, an interaction in person is not only refreshing, but it’s personable. It’s an amazing feeling to truly listen to someones thoughts and feelings, and vice versa. When I’m on the phone, chances are I’m playing Bejeweled or checking Twitter. Texting doesn’t account for tone either, which can manage to lead to unnecessary communication. You never know who may be in need of a friend, or how good it might feel to truly vent and talk to an old friend.

2) SAY “THANK YOU”



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This is probably the most powerful yet underrated term ever. It’s easy to say

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3 Things You Must Stop Doing To Yourself Immediately

Disclaimer: No matter what your age, Twenty, Teenage, Forty, Seventy Year olds can benefit from this post. Unless you’re perfect, in which case STOP READING NOW.

Stop it. Stop it right now! No I mean it. Look, if you think you have everything all figured out, then don’t read any further.  You’re perfect and amazing, and no need for improvement. If you just happened to snap out of it, or are like the rest of the population, listen up, take notes, and prepare to STOP doing the following things to yourself!!!!!



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1)  STOP Comparing! 

Everyone comes from a different walk of life. Some people fight for everything they have, and others have things handed to them on a silver platter. You were dealt your card, now progress forward. Stopping to think about what others have or don’t have on you is frankly a waste of time! Somebody blatantly copies you all the time? Pity them, unoriginality is boring, and it means you’re doing something right! Pay no other mind though, and keep moving forward at all costs!

Comparisons should be nothing more than motivation. Stopping to fret is a waste of time. 

2) STOP Waiting!  Continue reading



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